Even though it's received more positive media over the past few years, Bondage play, of any kind, is still a taboo form of sex. Because of all the myths and misconceptions about bondage and S&M (see Bondage Misconceptions article), many are surprised to find that they really like it. When I was in college many years ago, I also believed the myths about SM. So when my boyfriend mentioned that he wanted to try it, I was very nervous, especially because he wanted me to the Dom! I learned, through experience that Bondage toys are a great way to enhance sexual play. They are not something that has to be used every time you have sex, but some do because it's so erotic to do. So it is my hope that this article saves you a lot of the heart ache I once experienced and gets you excited about trying SM play.
In order to explain why someone would want to buy Bondage gear, we must first explore why someone would want to want to get involved in this type of play in the first place. And there are many reasons, none that consist of these people being crazy or devil worshippers.
It creates a strong emotional bond between lovers.
Giving your body and your mind up to your lover is a way of telling your lover that you completely trust him/her to pleasure you the way you like to be pleasured. Giving yourself in this way is very erotic.
It's very relaxing.
Letting go of all the responsibilities in your life, for just a few minutes...or hours...can be a wonderfully relaxing experience. Many high-powered business people enjoy being a Sub because their jobs and their lives are filled with being in charge and making lots of important and eve stressful decisions. Some people really get off by giving away the power.
It's very exciting.
Having your lover tie you up, teasing you and pleasing you and knowing that you can't touch him/her and not knowing what he/she is going to do to you next can be extremely exciting. It creates a strong feeling of anxiety, anticipation and desire that you don't get to feel without bondage play. For the Dom, being able to have such control over your lover is a great turn on. Knowing that he/she has given up control of their body to do whatever you wish to, within your lover's boundaries of course. It's a great mind fuck, excuse my language.
It allows partners to explore dominance and submission.
Simply restraining your lover allows you to enter into the world of SM. Once you explore it, even on the mild end, you and your partner can decide if you want to dive deeper into actual role playing and maybe more advanced types of play. It also allows you and your partner to switch roles in the relationship. In most relationships, there's one dominant partner. This type of play allows the dominant partner to kick back while the submissive partner takes charge. It can be a very refreshing change of roles and change of pace for a couple.
Bondage toys are designed to provide this pleasure, safely.
Most people don't feel it's necessary to purchase a nice set of restraints or whips for their bondage play because there's so many things that you can use around the house. That is true to a point. If you want to incorporate bondage into your sexual play often, it would be safer to purchase industry made bondage toys.
Most of the things that you find around your house to restrain your partner like stockings, rope, scarves, etc. can be dangerous. These things can get tighter around the Sub's limbs as he/she moves around, cutting off blood flow or even tearing through the skin. Most ropes are rough and can scratch and scrape the skin of your lover. Most industry made toys are wider, padded and easy to get out of in case of an emergency.
As for flogging toys, the adult industry makes available many different toys that beginners can use to explore flogging, that delivers noise and excitement of really doing it, but no pain. (See Flogging Toys section) The bondage kit, I recommend the most to those that want to explore this form of play, without breaking their wallet, is the Beginner's Bondage Kit because it has everything you need to get started with bondage play: a blindfold and wrist and ankle restraints. For those that want to take it to the next level, I suggest a more advanced kit, like the Ultimate Fantansy Kit.
So are you convinced yet?
No? That's okay, lots of people have been conditioned into believing that any type of bondage play is a mean, degrading and crazy activity to partake in. So don't' give up! Keep reading, there's still a lot more information for you to absorb and digest before making a final decision. There's lots of information within this site that can make using your bondage toys more pleasurable, because adult toys don't come with instructions.
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